Hi mama,
No one told me that becoming a parent would change my social life this much.
Before Ollie, I had my work friends, my “just me” friends, and the friends my husband and I shared as a couple. Nights out, brunch catch-ups, random messages and invitations — it all felt… normal.
Then I had a baby.
Suddenly, I wasn’t going into work every day, so I wasn’t seeing the people I used to talk to over coffee breaks or after meetings. My life now revolved around nap schedules, feeding times, and baby cuddles.
And those shared friends? Some of them completely vanished.
I don’t know if it’s because they’re being considerate and don’t want to bother us (thinking we’re too busy with the baby) or if they simply… removed our names from their contacts because we’re no longer “fun” or “cool.” Maybe it’s both.
The only friends who’ve stayed close (or at least as close as life allows) are the ones who are also parents. They get it — the messy houses, the exhausted evenings, and why a text message reply might take days.
It stings a little.
Don’t get me wrong — I wouldn’t trade my life with Ollie for anything, and I love the new parent friends I’ve made. But there’s something bittersweet about realizing how fast your social world can change, and how some people simply don’t follow you into this next season of life.
If you’re a new parent and feeling the same — you’re not alone. It’s not about losing your value as a friend; it’s about how life shifts and sometimes takes people in different directions. And while it hurts, it also opens doors to new friendships and deeper connections with the people who truly understand your life now.
With love to those who stayed (and understanding for those who didn’t),
Renata (Ollie’s mum) 💛